tisiv ot ecalp ecin a si lleh

Monday, July 21, 2008 | 5:33 PM

i will suffer for so long,
to make it up to you.
i'll do whatever you want me to do,
and if its not enough,
i'll try again and again over and over again.
i'm feeling rather screwed.
i miss you more than usual,
it's been way too long uhh.
and with what you said earlier on,
i have to prepare myself.
for that month full of pureness.
and its during the exam time.
so we have everything in the world to gain.
and i can't seem to say what i really want to when i'm with you.
maybe its cos i finally realize something.
that nothing is going the way it should.
its a great thing i have you.
the rest of my life is in tatters.
the way i get blamed for everything.
by the people i never expected.
maybe you guys just cant get used to not having sis around.
but do i have to be your fucken punching bag?
move there and leave me here for all i care.
i'd be way better off i swear.
this is the part where i scream,
but i'm not gonna let this get so far.
i'll fight with these eyes closed,
to protect what i believe in.
and thinking over what has been happening,
it ain't surprising that things are like this.
ever since sis left,
you two started making it hell.
well done uhh.
your knight in shining armor, will make your dreams come true.
he's not quite as charming as he may seem.
i admit, i'm just a fool for you.
i tried making you two happy,
but it wasn't worth it.
i though it'd be easy.
fuck, i was wrong.
i'm trying to let you know,
i'm just fine.
you took whats left of me,
and threw it all away.
can you guys fucking think how it affects other people?
other than yourselves?
you guys don't make the fucking world turn.
think it over.
till then,
i'm pretty much better now.
having gotten all these off my head.
but please, i've got my own views.
let me speak up for myself for once.
i already broke out of that shell,
even you would know.
hun, i love you laa.
we so have to hang out really soon!
after all the failed saturdays!
:D

Monday, July 07, 2008 | 10:40 AM

democracy is trampled on the floor.
oh well.
last day with my sister huh?
idk laa.
mixed emotions.
i'm happy for her uhh,
but at the same time
i don't want her to go.
so yeah,
alot of pple came over.
alot of food uhh.
power.
oh yeah, you get a free bun if you come to the airport!
;D
inside joke uhhh.
gna meet up with the dearest one later on before going to the airport.
damn its been a long time.
and this saturday,
it would be the greatest 2 months uhh.
:D

my last week was fucked uhh.
went to school for two days only.
wtf.
and i'm still sick.
damn.
went to ncc,
greatest regret of the week.
got pulled out of pt,
and i felt like shit after that.
oh well,
homework yet to be done.
i'm screwed.

till then,
saturday was wasted uhh, but it's okay. i understand. :D
and after today it's gonna be tough huh? oh well, this is super thick, but we strong pple are gonna smash it laa. iloveyou dear! and happy happy 2 months in advance uhh. :D

Tuesday, July 01, 2008 | 6:46 PM

damn,
i think my immune system is fucked.
i'm falling sick yet again.
D:
now it's the flu.
shit.
oh well, obs was mundane.
esp the time without phone.
even tougher than i ever expected.
let's see,
day 1.
went to camp 2, got into our watches, i was in marco polo.
was kinda skeptical since i knew little people, other than the few from 2E.
glad heetesh was there. so admin dragged on and on. then food was being given out, and after lunch we did belaying.
well, guys all had problems concealing a few stuffs.
RIGHT MERILYN AND JASMINE?
TSKTSKTSK. sick people.(;
it was fun cos that was the first real activity we did.
dinner was after that, i was kinda ticked off that we didn't have proper food for lunch,but ahboo,
our instructor is right, who would cater food for people who trek in the woods?
so we cooked rice, which was the start of nazri's madness. what the hell as i thinking. it's a good thing i accidentally deleted the other photo of me being mr ahyar. ;D tribute to the greatest lit and english teacher i've ever met. so yeah, after that was sleep. i kinda slept the whole night. dar was alr asleep by lights out so i couldn't call.

day 2

in the morning we had breakfast, but i didn't eat a thing cos i had no appetite.then we wrote in a tiny journal, which i couldn't be bothered to do. standard uhh.hmm, after that was rockclimbing.i decided to be a little enthu, so i went first. i got to the secondlast tile, already way past my expectations, then i got a lil tired and couldnt be bothered to keep trying. so much for enthu-ness huh? after that we were supposed to have a kayakinng expedition. so they obviously had to teach us the basics. i capsized with ahboo. not fun at all. then she taught us the t rescue. oh yeah, there was buoyancy test, and merilyn was freaking out. so since i didnt want her to panic i went with her. eventually she was my partner and we breezed through the expedition to camp 1. let's see, no bathing there. wow. sentry duty was done by us, interrupt my sleep only. tent was crowded, and it was HOT. plus STUFFY. heetesh, thanks for helping out with the bag full of ponchos uhh. i myself couldnt handle it. grats dude.

day 3

day of land expedition.woke up feeling like shit, after breakfast which i didnt eat, cos was somewhat full from the two packets of maggi or myojo. then we trekked awhile to some open place.there, the headache got worst. but i didn't wanna say anything, so i just shutted up. so on with the trek, i couldn't take it anymore after the second checkpoint. i sat and started shivering in the middle of some jungle in ubin. then i started to vomit. fuck. i really dont remember anything anyone said. in fact i only remember silence. shaun and kuanwee were rubbing medicated oil on my face and hands, idk who wrapped me in a poncho, idk who splashed water on me. that made me freeze. idk who used a towel and wet it and put it on my forehead. anyways, thanks to all of you for your care and concern uhh. you guys are appreciated much. proof that marco polo is united uhh, or starting to unite. so i was sent to the medical centre, i got forced to eat lunch, when i didnt have an appetite at all. then i got forcd to rest in the sick bay. i couldn't get much rest. for one, these 2 women entered and invaded my bed in the middle. i asked to be sent back to join the rest, seriously, but she siad i had to wait for em to complete the trek. i feel real bad for making them carry my stuff uhh. sorry much, and thanks much. i finally joined back with them, had cooking competition, where everyone was the winner. and marco polians all over the place were making a fool of ourselves. i dressed up as mr ahyar, impersonated a few pple, and went racing in the trolley until some instructor reprimanded us(me and my driver, jeshua!) haha. sleep was up next, after a few irrelavant activities. we couldnt sleep at first, we were supposed to hang out, but the only pple who went were heetesh(he wanted to shit) jasmine, erina and myself. we talk talk talk, gossip gossip gossip, then weijie joined in, we went on, the horror of all horrors, AHBOO CAME. she made us write a reflection. -.-haha. went to sleep after that. mission impossile uhh, the snoring machine, shannon phua peh hsien was in the tent right next to me. in fact we were right next to each other cos our doors faced each other and we both slept at the door. -.-

last day

lets see, jetty jump was pretty fun. especially since we all had to shout out sth we learnt abt life i think before jumping. so yeah, it was awesomee. especially the few seconds that you're floating or flying, before hitting the water surface. after bathing we had store inspection and soon after, it was time to part.

the whole camp was a totally new learning experience to me. it's pretty evident to me now that nobody can succeed in life all alone. everyone needs a team and family as well as friends to support them. i'm grateful to everyone for making the whole thing less tough with the dumb stuffs that we do.

to Rachel,Jasmine,Merilyn,BoonYee,HuiJun,JiaYou,Heetesh,Farhan,Shaun,KuanWee,Shannon,Nicholas,Jeshua and haziq, you guys sure made this whole thing enjoyable and meaningful.

Heetesh, you've been a beyond great help to me. You're a great pillar of support too. great times in 2E huh?

well, thats about all i can remember. yeah.

till i stick my ass back here,

adios.

hun, i missed you like **** laa. good thing i could call and text you huh? sorry for the whole day of inactivity though, phone went bonkers. i love you sotong! wasted i didn't see any in the sea. haha

the man